This week I’ve spent a lot of time reflecting on this process of blogging/social media and what I want from it. I’ve also spent time thinking about the current situation we are all in. Life just continues to have so many twists and turns. People are asked to do so many things differently. We all hope we can keep it together but frankly it’s impossible. I often think how would I manage this is I had a full-time outside job that would also demand time from me. I want to invest way more time into this blog and the social media but I just don’t have enough time. I feel so pulled. How do I take care of my family but also do some things that fill my bucket like this blog.
Keeping up with everything and doing it with a smile…I’m struggling with this. Last weekend I noticed a friend was rattled. I don’t often see her like this. She is someone who stays remarkably calm with a million things going on. I’m always in awe. After seeing her and going home she sent me a message apologizing for her patience being tried. By the way, she wasn’t short with me. I responded to saying,
“Take a breath, give yourself some grace, and have a glass of wine! Then give yourself some more grace.”
The word grace keeps coming to me this week. I am not very good at this for myself. I get so discouraged when I can’t to do it all and especially can’t do it all well. Parenting has been so so humbling. When I was a teacher (without any children) parents would ask me for advice or…I would give advice. It’s kind of embarrassing actually. I mean what the hell did I know?!!! Nothing. I was a teacher and worked daily with children and before that I nannied forever, but the relationship between parent and child is just so so different. It’s so much harder. So. Much. Harder!
There are so many things to juggle with children. They each have their own personality and ways of dealing with things. My three children are all completely different. But what they do share is VERY STRONG PERSONALITIES and VERY STRONG WILLS. Ugh someday it will serve them well but sometimes it is so hard to parent. And right now I’m not only the parent but I’m also the teacher. My oldest does awesome with distance learning. Honestly he’s just flourishing. I love the hybrid model for him because he gets his social interactions but he gets the gift of time at home. Now my daughter is not loving it. Things that are harder for her are a total battle. Fine motor skills are harder for her and boy does she buck it. And then there is my youngest. Fortunately I signed him up for preschool and longer days. He goes on two of the days the big kids are home. Thank goodness, honestly I don’t know how I could manage it all. By the way he’s three and as sweet as they come until you want something from him he’s not interested in. The tantrums are real in this house.
So back to grace. Do you find it hard to be graceful with yourself? I really feel I give others in my life so much grace and feel most people are doing their very best. I believe people are constantly trying to do as much as they can. I encourage my friends to give themselves grace. Why is it so hard to do that for myself? Why do I feel like such a failure, a lot? I wonder sometimes if I’m the only one who is screwing up and feeling so frustrated. I can’t be, right?
My first goal for this week is to give myself some grace. Forgive my misgivings and honor my triumphs. I’m going to try to understand I can’t do it all. I’m also going to try to help myself by planning better. My plan was to get the kids school stuff together on Sunday and I didn’t do it. Then Tuesday came and I wasn’t prepared. I just can’t do that to myself or to the kids. It doesn’t go well. Yes, school materials are mostly being provided but I’m also including other materials. I want them to get as much out of this year as possible. But we can’t have an organized day if we aren’t organized. It just starts everything on a negative note and it’s hard to recover from that.
My second goal for this week is to plan more with my blog/social media. My husband recently asked me how long I was going to keep doing this. He was challenging me to keep learning to continue to grow. This whole gig is way harder and more work than I could ever expect. While I wanted to be offended, what it really did was challenge me to reach out to learn more. I can’t keep growing if I don’t keep growing. There are so many bloggers and influencers out there, why not turn to them to learn. I found an awesome podcast, The Influencer Podcast, and I’m learning so much. My take away for this week is to schedule things out more. Right now Binks and I are pretty casual with our posts. I want to be more intentional with what I’m doing. If I can’t always meet those goals/deadlines I will give myself grace but if I write it down maybe just maybe I’ll be more organized. And maybe with more organization I can continue to grow the BB and Binks brand!
‘Wherever Life Plants You, Bloom with Grace”Avematieu.com